"1984" by Spirit

The Best of Spirit front of cover and Side 1 of Epic issue

The Best of Spirit back of cover and Side 2 of Epic issue

I woke up this morning, Mariah was crying because she didn't want to go to school.  I opened the kitchen blinds and could hardly see out for all the snow on the tree branches and I thought sarcastically "It's another beautiful day in the neighborhood".

But then I thought to myself: "NO!  It *IS* ANOTHER BEAUTIFUL DAY IN THE NEIGHBORHOOD!!!".  And it WILL BE a good day, DAMMIT!!

I was feeling pretty good after that.  Then a few minutes after SueZQ left to take Mariah to school, she called to tell me the fuel light was blinking in the Prius and she thought she had enough to get Mariah to school but was not sure she had enough gas to make it back home.  I told her I would meet her out at the Costco by Valley Fair Mall.

I threw some clothes on, went out and Lily (the Trans-mobile) was covered in snow of course and some of it had turned to ice on the windows.  I went out and got on I-215 and it was basically a parking lot.  Stop and go about 5 MPH.  I decided screw that, I'll go out to Bangerter, it was moving mostly okay Southbound so I was at least making progress.

I got to Costco and started SueZQ filling up the Prius.  There was some dude in a pickup truck filling up adjacent to her that was giving me the evil eye.  After he left I asked SueZQ about it and she said she saw him too.

After I filled Lily up I had to go to the credit union to put some cash in our account because I was worried there wasn't enough money in our account to cover the gas if some bills went through.  I felt like I kinda freaked the teller out.  I'm never sure if it was my being trans or maybe she was just new?  I was not feeling the good vibe in West Valley City this morning for sure.

But it did cheer me up some when I stopped for some ducks crossing the road and there were some kids running around playing in the snow.

I stopped to let these ducks cross the road

But I was feeling kinda down again when I got home.  I went back to bed for a while because I was feeling shitty again.  This  afternoon I got up and went downtown to pick up some items at Trader Joe's and Natural Grocers.  I saw several of my friends at both places and they lifted me up and I was feeling really good again.

In thinking about the "Wrinkle in Time" movie yesterday I started thinking about how much I've struggled since last November.  I started thinking about the similarity between the battle between light and darkness in the movie and how I've battled the last several months.

So I think this song is relevant today for two different reasons: one of course is this current (Trump) administration being fascist and, two the line: "he's going to tell you the darkness gives you much more than you get from the light".

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nxlhToVMfbQ
YouTube (live TV): https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gtzS93HDQeE
YouTube (live TV 1970): https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SqG0BXWPJzs